Wednesday, September 30, 2009

First Sightings in the Perfect Hawaii Sea

Swimming in the perfect blue warm sea outside their bedroom window in Hau’ula, PP revels in its embrace. Ah! Hawaii ocean. There’s no swimming like it in the world! She could swim all day in this sea if she didn’t get hungry or her ear plugs didn’t leak or she didn’t have to go to the bathroom.

Okay you didn’t need to know that last one.

But it was so lovely to be back in Hawaii again. PP swims and swims and swims. Out to the breaking waves on the coral reef several hundred yards from the shore and back again.

Dashingly Handsome Boyfriend is also in the sea, swimming away with his snorkel and red zoomers. So serious and cute in the Hau’ula waters.

Afterwards, resting on the porch that overlooks the water, PP sighs happily.

Till DHBF gets out of the water. Too breathless with excitement to be believed.

“You know what I saw?”
“You’ll never guess.”
“No, probably not.”
"I saw a turtle….” He waits for PP’s excited response. She sighs inwardly. How come she never sees a turtle? In fact when she thinks about it she hasn’t seen one since she’s been coming to Hawaii with DHBF. He must be taking all the Turtle Sightings away from her.
“Really?” She doesn’t try to keep the envy and disappointment for her selfish turtleless self out of her tone.

He doesn’t notice, but carries on. So excited. “Yeah! A Big One!” He spreads his arm wide demonstrating the Turtle’s Monster Size.

How could she have missed it? Part of her doesn’t believe that he really saw one. But then she knows better. DHBF Never lies! (At least that’s what he’s been telling her all these years.)

“….he was so close to me! And I could almost touch it and then it saw me and just up and sprinted away.” He pauses for a breath. Not waiting for her response this time. He’s so goddamned excited. “And you know what else I saw?”
“A Sting Ray!”
“Really? Aren't those poisonous?”
“Hmmm....I dunno...maybe. Anyway, it was real close too, but then it saw me and swoosh! It flew off. It was incredible!”

He looks down at her, sitting wet and morose on the white plastic porch chair. But PP doesn’t think he notices her cranky Sea Animal Sightingless State.

“What did you see?” he pauses, asking her.
She sighs, “You won't believe it...."
"Try me!"
"I can hardly believe it myself, especially after hearing your stories."
"What did you see?

"Well...." A little smile creeps up, "I did see a couple of golf balls."

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Hawaii Hair at Sunset Beach

“That’s a Nice Hairdo!”

PP hears this out of the corner of her curls. A couple of scraggly surfers are clambering around a pick up truck, packing away their surfboards. Smoking a joint? There’s that Stoner Tinge to the air.

“Are you talking to me?” she asks, pleasantly surprised as she comes out of the bathroom at Sunset Beach.
“Yeah, Dude,” Surfer Boy says.
Laughing, she grins, “It’s my Hawaii Hair. The air here makes it Bigger.”

“It’s Awesome,” Surfer Boy's Buddy agrees, coming to the side of the truck to admire.
“Thanks,” PP beams. He’s cute. But way too young for her. Though it’s nice to know that her hair can still work some sort of effect.

Even if it is only in Hawaii....

Just another reason to stay in Paradise, right?

Friday, September 11, 2009

Off to Hauula Hawaii!

PP and DHBF are off for the Islands next week. Yipee! R&R in Paradise is PP's favorite. The swimming. The hiking. The swimming. The reading. (She's bringing Trollope's Prime Minister as well as assorted galleys from her years at the bookstore: Eva Moves the Furniture, My Russian, Some other Scottish Soap Opera Time Travel Novel (No this isn't the title, but that'd be good, eh?) More Swimming. Napping. Swimmming.....

We'll go hiking in the lush Hauula Hills; that is if the Hauula Loop Trail is open. So far it's always been closed because?.....who knows....who cares? We'll just go to the beach if we can't hike. Which sounds just fine. Doesn't it?

Or maybe we'll see a super cute beached seal in Hauula?
Hope so!

PP's not big on the Whole Fish Thing, but the fisherman is cute!

Ahh....night walks on the there anything better?


Tuesday, September 08, 2009

Thea At Big Al's

Rambunctious, giggling, LOUD, group of African American Teenage Girls careen past the three of them (PP, DHBF & Thea) chowing down on fish and chips, corn dogs, fries and of course Milk Shakes.

One of the girls pauses before slamming inside Al’s, “Is this place any good?”
Thea nods ever so slightly, her big beautiful eyes hidden safely behind her dark dark glasses, murmurs coolly as only a White Girl Torrance Teen can, “They have good Milkshakes.”


The Girls screech, holler, jump up and down in Milkshake Anticipatory Hysteria. Pile into Big Al’s, slamming the door behind them.

Thea takes a sip of her shake, gives a little smile.
“That certainly was a good answer,” PP remarks.
Thea shrugs, then glances at her watch, “I think we should go. The bus will be here in 10 minutes.”

PP realizes that this little scene has no connection to swimming. Unless you count the assumption that those Three Screaming Teens may very well end up swimming in a Pineapple Shake. Or a Coffee Shake. Or a Peanut Butter Shake. Or....

Thursday, September 03, 2009

DL's First Lines from Utopia: A Poet's Perspective

"i don't like to sweat before a professional engagement"

"i try to avoid professional engagements as much as possible"

"heat is a migraine trigger"

"the third towel opens up many possibilities"

"the otter popped its head up and was THIS close"

"once i caught waves with dolphins"

"the sea turtles were serene"

"oprah says to use the ball against the wall"

"my core is really bad"
"mine too"
"our cores want to be more coreful"

"7-11 has ice cream, it will be dinner"

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

I Might Hit You!

”I’m very clumsy. I might hit you!”

PP’s Lil’ Sweet Sis stared at Noodle Clumsy Woman in astonished disbelief. Can it be that Noodle Woman is refusing to share a lane? Here she was at the LA Fitness Pool with PP and DHBF just trying to get a swim in, and when she’d asked if she could share the lane, this was the response?

The nerve!

Every Veteran Lap Swimmer knows that you can’t say ‘No’ when someone asks to share your lane. Of course, there are all sorts of strategies to avoid lane sharing: not making eye contact, mighty flip turns (this is a decidedly effective Aggressive Passive Aggressive (APA--not to be confused with an inane form of citing sources for Psych Students) form of not making eye contact), growling, burping, farting, …..Okay, you get the idea.

Poor Lil Sweet Sis! She was taken aback, PP was certain of this. (Though she got the story from her after the fact.) PP had been deep into her ‘swimming zone’ by the time Sis tried to get into NCW’s lane; she was so happy to finally be in the pool!

They’d first tried to swim at the Encinitas YMCA, but it was CLOSED of all things “It’ll be open on Friday,” the Clearly Imbecilic Kid at the counter said when they’d mentioned they were visiting for the day from Oakland. “That won’t help us today,” PP had snarled.

A helpful Encinitas Swimmer Guy had given them directions to the La Jolla Y---long and involved, down Hwy 5, then up Hwy 8…then…..” PP had spaced out; DHBF had nodded and tried to explain that he didn’t know where any of the freeways were; Lil Sis just smiled politely and then when he left said that she’d just take them to her LA Fitness Club and pay the guest fee, which was 15 bucks a piece. “That’s Highway Robbery!” Lil Sis had exclaimed to the poor harried young woman at the front desk. “The Oakland Y lets us bring in 2 guests per month for free” PP had pointed out. Nice Fitness Manager overhearing the whining, came over, “How about 2 for 1”? Which they’d taken.

And so now, PP was blissfully swimming in the sweet little LA fitness indoor pool without a care in the world cuz finally she was in the water! (The YMCA closure was, of course, so stressful for her swimming obsession! To think that she might not have been able to swim at all? What a disaster that woulda been!)

Driving them home later, Lil Sis had exclaimed, “She didn’t say, 'I hope I don’t swim into you. Or I’m afraid I’m not a very good swimmer so if I run into you, then I’m super sorry.' No. She said ‘I hope I don’t HIT you.’ Meaning, swim at your own risk. So, when I said, ‘Oh, well I guess you don’t want me to swim in your lane,” she had seemed suitably sheepishly embarrassed, ‘Oh, no I didn’t mean that.’”

“Of course she did!” PP had cried. “It was a Strategy. Such a ‘warning’ can only mean, Stay OUT of MY lane.”

“Exactly!” LS cried. “It’s a public pool! She can’t have her OWN lane.”

Then PP had told the story of how her friend KW had had the same thing happen to her—see a previous blog from god knows when; so it does happen.

But when it does? What to do?

Lil Sis had just felt bad and then had swum in the next lane.

PP woulda just gotten in anyway and swiped NCW’s Noodle away from her and then brained her with the foamy device.

How satisfying would that be?

Of course, if PP had done such a thing, then she probably woulda been sued for Swimmer Noodle Injury ….Plus she’d signed some waiver at the LA fitness front desk which of course she hadn't read very closely cause she just wanted to get in the pool for chrissakes! So she probably wouldn’t get any protection from LA Fitness.

Had the waiver banned Noodle Head Bonking to any and all? Even if they were the most deserving non-etiquette paying attention swimmers?

Maybe so.

Maybe not.

But it would just be PP’s luck if it did.

And she certainly did not need to deal with such a Noodle Bonking Contingency, esp. when she was supposed to be visiting her family and enjoying her swim.

Maybe LS coulda just responded with, “That’s okay. I’m clumsy too. And I hope I Don’t Hit you either….”

And then given her a good ‘accidental’ kick underwater....